Squaring the Circle: [ECL 5] Lulu, human bard 5: Bio

 

Squaring the circle: ECL 6 Noname Human Brute Holy warrior 6 Entry 15

I nearly succumbed to the shift of the scales. I have never fought water before and I don't wish to again. The forms shifted and morphed away from my attacks but theirs hit with the full force of a wave and just as unavoidable. In my frustration and anger, my aim when wide and struck Melino. It felt like I had struck my self when she fell to the ground. Battered and bloodied, we were able to defeat the slippery enemy and had a new companion, Lulu. A big girl who handled herself well during the fight. The creatures seemed to have some of the properties of the River Styx. Both Melino and Lulu had their heads engulfed by the water creatures and seem to not remember much of the last few days (Melino) or why she was here (Lulu). Since I was not affected by the waters, I brought Lulu up to speed of our mission. About Tepheon and the Maeldur. And the orb to communicate with it.

We set up camp with our final destination barely insight. We planned to sleep in shifts to recover our strength and I volunteered first watch. Melino and Lulu had been sleeping for maybe an hour or so when I saw two figures appear. They were some distance away and started to approach me. As they got closer, I recognized them as William and Shemeshka but not as they were. They appeared undead, naked, with a wand made of tongues. I called out to them and they stopped in their tracks. Melino stirred behind me in the tent and shouted "IT'S US!" Melino and I approached William and Shemeshka. They did not react as Melino retrieved the orb form William's hand. Even as I touched the tongue wand to Shemeshka, which caused four spider like legs to sprout form her, she did not move. I wrapped the wand in a bed wrap to be safe and placed it along with the orb into the bag of holding.

We quickly packed up camp and made our way back to the portal we came from. Again we encountered the Guardian and she requested payment. I pulled the tongue wand from my bag and unwrapped it from the bed wrap. She without hesitation snatched it from me and disappeared into the dark cave. We turned to the portal and used our keys to activate it. Suddenly, Tepheon and his demons appeared at the mouth of the cave. "She has my wand! Bring it to me!" shouted Tepheon. With Tepheon focused on the Guardian, we passed through the portal just as it collapsed. 

Back at the hotel, resting and healing, I was finally able to sleep. I hope it is a restful one.

Praise the Balance.

Squaring the Circle: Melino lvl 6 Half Elf Druid Entry 14

 We kept walking towards the pool and saw a large lady being....sucked by the water? Like it was crawling into her insides. Noname thought she was in need of help (like the heroic man he is) so we got closer to help her. Then a couple extra droplet people came to attack us. I got knocked out multiple times, and I can’t remember much of this past month...

When I awoke, we had an extra adventurer with us. An opera singer no less! She’s beautiful and knows how to beat up fiends. I think we are going to be besties for sure! She also can’t seem to remember what happened. She doesn’t know why she’s here. Noname explained as much as he could about what we were doing. I understood...not much. But whatever. I’ll do what he tells me. We were all doing pretty badly so LuLu (my new BFF) and I slept in the tent while Noname watched for any fiends. I was thrown into a dream where I looked like William! I didn’t know where I was but I saw Shameshka laying down across from me. I tried calling her name but she responded that she was LuLu! We explored and exchanged information (and clothes at one point) before coming upon a hoard of zombies. We figured it would be best to join them to get some more knowledge about what was going on. That idiot that killed William took me out of the crowd and tried to place me on a slab. I refused, acting like a mindless zombie the entire time, while LuLu laid on one of the slabs. The idiot ran off and ignored us, so onto searching we went. We found a lot of body parts....and a triangle orb thing? And a staff of tongues? It all sounds so familiar. I think Noname talked to me about it...it’s the stupid orb we needed? I started getting nervous and high on energy. “We gotta go NOW” I said, as we heard rumbles come from underneath us. Teflon was coming. LuLu found a weird circle hidden under a bunch of limbs. She gave me the staff and orb and sent me through it. She followed soon after. We were outside? Is that...Noname? Are we awake? What’s going on?? 

He called out to us. I woke up. I heard him yelling about zombies. I ran out and told him to calm down. It was difficult to explain but I think I got him to calm down. I went near the zombies that LuLu and I possessed. I guess it wasn’t a dream. We grabbed the objects and ran back to the gate.

Felt it best to give the tongue staff to that guardian lady. Man did she love it. We saw Teflon teleport to our area but I left so fast I didn’t bother to think about it. We ended up at our usual inn. I just wanted to rest. As I rested, I tried to remember what LuLu had repeated while holding the orb.

The 7th layer of hell. He lies in the mobile fortress labeled “The Relentless”. 

DM Entry: The Planar Cant

PLANAR CANT

Don't get peeled cutter, make sure you're reading Sigil's only underground newsrag that matters.

Top story today. The Lady has finally had enough of the Bixiinae and their rapid overpopulation. As a result, she's mazed the entire lot of them. Several businesses that had been run almost entirely by Bixiinae are temporarily closed while their owners' scramble to find new workers. Prices are up right now all across the Great Bazaar due to shortages. Expect prices to be about double or sometimes triple right now.

In other news, the Harmonium are setting up guard stations everywhere within eyeshot of what is sure to be an unprecedented turnout for the viewing of who some are calling the Son of Sigil. Services are being held in two days for the local soothsayer William who, as you should already know, was killed in an ambush recently. There has been a hot debate about what name to put on his headstone. Tanar'ri representatives from the Abyss are insisting his full demon name be inscribed on the stone, Apocaloxon Loggonon. Meanwhile others such as the Portal Master and Shemeahka are insisting that he had given up that name for his new chosen name William when he turned stag on the Blood War and became a permanent resident of Sigil. A spokesman from the Harmonium had this to say, "We don't really care what name gets put on that demon's headstone, we're just here to keep a funeral from breaking out into a war."

Squaring the Circle: [ECL 5] Lulu, human bard 5: Entry 1

"So I woke up in hell the other day,"
Nah - can that crap. Utterly trite. All the devils will walk right out. But then, they're only ever there for the second act, anyway. Plus, it's been years since I did stand-up. I don't even have a show booked. Right? ...Right? Shit. Maybe I do. Probably too late to cancel.

Okay. Which damp-faced dumbfuck had the bright idea for me to go to hell? Me? My agent? Susan? What a fiasco. Can't remember why I came. Must have been a gig, right? Hope it went well. Who even hires a singer out there? Wait, was it the water guys? Was that the act? Shit. They stiffed me.

I'd kill my agent, but if I know me, and I do, I already did. Hopefully, he suffered. I should be so lucky.

Oh well. Honestly? Not the worst job I've had. Even met some fans - eh, who am I kidding? They never heard of me. To spare my own ego, I'm gonna assume that's because they've been too busy with this seriously shady business. I mean, I know shady business, and this business is shadier than my taint. You don't stand under shade this shady, understand? Liable to get sat on.

Too late, though - think I'm an accomplice now. Best to brace for impact, hope for soft cheeks. Started having weird dreams, which turned out to not be dreams. First I thought one of my new friends slipped me something Bytopic. Still not sure they didn't. None of it makes any sense. For example: That tongue thing? Doesn't make any sense. All those bodies? Don't make any sense. You see where I'm going with this? Every time I try to describe what just happened, I realize what I'm about to say sounds fucking stupid, so I give up.

Enough. Gonna sleep now. Look for a spellweaver masseuse in the morning.

Squaring the circle: ECL 6 Noname Human Brute Holy warrior 6 Entry 14

I fear that the balance does not touch this realm. I performed my morning ritual for strength and felt nothing. It could be that the balance has deemed me strong enough for the challenges ahead. Based on our recent encounter with some four legged creatures, I want to believe in the balance. I was able to trip such creatures not just once but multiple times. I do fear the day when the balance scales tip out of my favor. I do believe that if Melino is by my side, I can face the odds. I watch her from time to time. It is difficult with how many eyes she has and I believe see does know of the glances I steal. Praise the Balance .... and keep her safe.

Squaring the Circle: Melino lvl 6 Half Elf Druid Entry 13

We asked the crazy dead raiser for some help doing some spells. She told us to basically stomp on the name of teflon and we would get what we wanted. Highly sus. I don’t want to do it but I’m the one who needs it the most. She dragged our kill away, happy as can be.

Loli wanted desperately to stop by the Pool of Clearest Water on our way to the leader so we headed that way. While walking along, we saw 5 creepy beings galloping towards us. DIDNT like the sight of that, especially when I’m hurt and don’t have many spells I can use. While they were charging, I remembered I’d prepped my lightening for this layer of hell. We killed 2 out of the 5 of them. The other 3 ran off a distance and kept watching us like wolves, waiting for the chance to strike. We got sick of this very quickly. 

“This is annoying,” Loli would say. “Let’s just kill them and be done with it.

I agreed. We came up with a slightly elaborate plan pretending to sleep to lure them in. Once they dropped their guard and came closer, I cast Wind Wall to prevent them from skittering off again. This time we wouldn’t let them leave alive. 

Or

That was the plan I guess

I couldn’t get my spell to work

So

We quickly tried to decimate them before they could run like the big babies they were. We got all but one, who ran off hopefully to never be seen again. 

We were on the road again and came upon the Pool of Clearest Water, at last.

I’m suddenly so thirsty.

DM Entry...Noname slips into Trance

 Noname approaches the Clearest Water, and slips into a trance...

Darkness fills your vision, like an oppressive hot blanket. The metallic scent of a building clashes with the scent of rotting flesh, like a dumpster behind a popular restaurant on a hot summer day, except way worse. Like several dozen such dumpsters upwind from you. 

The rumble of distant heavy footfalls breaks the silence. The stride is slow, suggesting a massive size. The flicker of an approaching torchlight provides an escape from the darkness, illuminating a descending metal passageway. The torchlight seems to brighten a little more with each rumbling footfall. Then the source of both sound and light emerge into the passageway, heading toward you. A massive boar like head, above a gluttonous naked, roughly humanoid body covered in a thin layer of course hair. His head is down, reading an open book held in hand that is also the source of a torch like illumination. The obviously male beastly demon mutters in a deep bass voice as he reads, only half forming words. At the peak of the stairs, he continues over to a lectern. You seem to be perched somehow above the floor by at least 30 feet, seeing all of this below you. With his other hand he drags the lectern in another direction, finally illuminating two metal slabs, each with an unmoving body laying on its back. One a fox-headed female in a formal evening gown, the other a human male in a tuxedo. The demon stops near them, sets the lectern upright, and gingerly places the glowing book thereon. One could imagine the demon performing a matrimonial ceremony for two deceased lovers. The demon places both hands on the sides of the top surface of the lectern, and slightly arches his back, allowing the lectern to support his weight as he reads. His voice suddenly booms, speaking his words with authority. Arcane lettering in the book illuminates in bright fiery orange one at a time corresponding to the spoken words.

Idcirco praecipio tibi ut Tapheon iure meo, id est dominus noster iacuit in abyssum irent.

Abyssal Translation: [[ I command you by my right as Tapheon, lord of this layer of the Abyss. ]]

The male body in the tuxedo begins to twitch.

Parere antiquis cultus dialogum. Surge a mortuis, et te ipsum mihi materiam fuisse.

[[ Obey the ancient dialogue. Rise from the dead and enthrall yourself to me. ]]

A grey smoke begins to swirl around both the speaker and the male corpse.

Ego petenti daret. Et renasci Apocaloxon Loggonon. Et vos eritis mihi servus.

[[ I demand it. You will be reborn, Apocaloxon Loggonon. You will be my slave. ]]

The eyelids of the dead man flash open, revealing a pair of bright red glowing dead eyes. Yet the body still does nothing more than twitch. The voice of the demon increases in volume and forcefulness.

Ut dici quod anima tuis quibus praevaricata es filius meus. Surge, et sta super...

[[ I claim your rebellious soul as my son. Arise, stand upon thy... ]]

...the magic ceremony is interrupted by a babau, "Tapheon," it yells as it enters the room. The swirling smoke evaporates, and the dead man closes his eyes and ceases twitching. In response, Tapheon turns to face the babau who appears to be the size of a halfling by comparison. In a swift motion the massive demon pounces the babau, pinning it to the floor, breathing through his teeth in anger. "What was so fucking important that you had to interrupt me right now?!"

Their faces nearly touching, the babau begins to whimper in fear. "...please..." the sound barely escapes its mouth.

"Answer me question before I tear your arms from your body and add them to me pile of arms!" Tapheon is in a calm panting rage, although he waits for the answer.

 The babau stutters in intense fear. "The...the...the bug, barbarian, and broad have re...re...reached the clear water...s...s...sir..."

Tapheon calms visibly, his panting ceases, and he stands to his feet. He even holds out his hand to help the babau stand. The babau hesitates, but fears punishment for noncompliance worse than anything else right now and reaches out his hand.

A loud pop precedes the shrieks of pain that come from the babau as Tapheon tears the arm from the babau and tosses it in a pile of arms nearby. "I did say answer before I do it, did I not?" Tapheon says mockingly. "I never said your answer would prevent it from happening."

Tapheon suddenly stops moving. His massive head snaps directly toward you. His eyes narrow. "Well, well, well. What have we hear, Magganax?"

The babau is searching for his arm in the pile, "No one could know better than you, mighty Lord Tapheon."

"This is no ordinary fly upon me wall. I feel its presence..."

At this Noname snaps out of his trance.

Squaring the circle: ECL 5 Noname Human Brute Holy warrior 5 Entry 13

 We fought a weird tentacle monster that was chasing the guardian. It wasn’t really a tough fight. Melino was the main target. We were able to kill the creature and are now in the good graces of the guardian.

Squaring the Circle: ECL 4 Loli Loomfinski Human Crusader lvl 4: entry 9

 babies i have no idea whats been going on, ive been on the craziest bender and im just stopping seeing stars, i fight better hungover anyways we can run it.